Way back in March, the lady at Supercuts pointed out a lump on Gabe’s ear.

Because I’m such an awesome mom, I had not noticed it and have no idea when it popped up.  Just give me the “Mother of the Year” award.

Of course, as soon as I was aware of it, I did what any good mother would do.  I freaked out.  Then I took him to the pediatrician.  Who then referred him on to a ten week wait list for the ENT (ear, nose, throat doctor).  While waiting for the ENT appointment, my husband’s work changed our insurance.  We started over…back to the new pediatrician who then referred us to a six week wait list for the new ENT.

It’s been a lot of waiting.

We were finally seen in May by a super adorable Kaiser ENT who again, wanted to wait and watch.

Ugh.

He was able to tell me it was “just a cyst” and it did not look like cancer or any other worrisome growth.  That was a huge relief.  The lump does not hurt and Gabe hardly seems to notice it.  He wanted to see us again in six (more) weeks to see if it would change.

Yesterday we saw Dr. Super Adorable again.

Paraphrased:  “blah blah blah your baby needs to go under general anesthesia blah blah blah it could start to get big and painful blah blah blah it can come out now or later blah blah blah surgery.”

So, basically, it’s a cyst that suddenly appeared sometime before March and hasn’t changed much since.  It could never change, or it could suddenly hit a growth spurt and then it would be harder to remove.  It is not life threatening but could become painful if it starts to grow.

I told him to schedule the surgery.

EEK!

And then on my way home I started doubting my decision.

* No food or drinks for eight hours before surgery?  Gabe will FREAK the freak out if he doesn’t get his chocolate milk in the morning (spoiled much?).  It’s just that he is a creature of habit and does not deviate from  his schedule or routine easily.  Anthony or Nathan could have this disruption in their day and not bat an eyelash.  I am afraid Gabe might lose it.

*  He is only five!  Such a little guy to have surgery!

*  It is not mandatory that I do it now.  But is it better to just get it over with while he is young (won’t remember) and cut it out before it causes any trouble?

Tell me it will be okay.

PS:  Surgery is MONDAY!  eek! {hold me}